I walk in their bedroom and wish I hadn’t. I saw my boys clean their room the day before; I know it happened. But now? Who can tell? Legos, papers, kleenex, they are all over.
But I say to myself,
“I’m lettin’ this go.”
They all sit at the kitchen table working on homework, and all are asking me questions at the same time. I can barely think to answer one child before another one is talking.
But I say to myself,
“I’m lettin’ this go.”
I make dinner and get it on the table and we sit down to eat. I correct the one who chews with his mouth open and remind another to please, please, please eat over his plate. There are a dozen other things to pick on but I say to myself,
“I’m lettin’ these go.”
The kids take for-ev-er to brush teeth and put on pajamas but it’s finally done and we snuggle up for Bible reading and prayers. Afterwards, I want to read a chapter from Caddie Woodlawn but they want to listen to Adventures in Odyssey which comes on the radio right this second, so upstairs they go. I am really into this little book so I’m disappointed, but I say to myself,
“I’m lettin’ this go.”
So after snuggling I come downstairs to work on a few things as well as read some blogs I enjoy. One has a video, and it’s when I start it that my man starts to tell me a story. I sigh just a little bit (he still hears) as I push pause while thinking,
“I’m lettin’ this go.”
He finishes the story so I hit “play” again. I’m just getting into it when he laughs out loud and takes a breath to tell me all about what’s so funny. Only I don’t let him. I’m done. D O N E. I am done lettin’ things go so I let him know I have no desire to hear it ’til I am done with what I want to do. Yep, I am done and empty and tired.
My attitude doesn’t improve much ’til the next morning when I’m reading from John 2 where Jesus performs His first miracle at a wedding. The party is in full swing but the wine is running low. So, Jesus instructs the servants to take six stone jars and fill them with water. After they do so, the servants take the water-turned-to-wine to the banquet master. After tasting it, the banquet master tells the bridegroom,
“Everyone brings the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.” John 2:10 NIV
Sometimes it’s when you’re running on empty that the circumstances are right for God to make His move.
I think of Paul who says I don’t do what I want to do and I feel his pain. I am a sin-mucky girl and an empty mess on my own.
I call on God and He scoops me out of my mess (again) with a message for my heart,
“I’m lettin’ this go. You should, too.”
He always lets it go while holding onto us. No matter the size of our screw-up or how impossible the situation seems, God is ready for a rescue. It’s His specialty.
I speak gratitudes and find my man and hug him and tell him I’m sorry. My always quick-to-forgive husband hugs me back and says,
“Let me tell you what was so funny last night…”
I hear you. Sometimes it hard to let it go.
Thanks.
Kath
Since I am working on a similar post this morning – I refer to my little boy who is now 26!! ENJOY every moment GOD gives you with your little one!! It will all be gone before you know it!! AND you will ache for the time again!!! Blessings and enjoyed your post!!
I take the words of you wiser-moms-with-older-kids seriously…I am enjoying their presence in the present! Thank you, Maxine.
What a good post. I like when I can “let things go” and get so down on myself when I finally lose it.
It’s a good reminder to always apologize afterward!
Kristy
Kristy, it’s a lesson I keep having to learn…I am black and blue from beating myself up!
This is great. I have days like this as well, it isn’t easy, but letting go is freeing. Thanks for this 😉
Oh, I love this! Because you see, I too am “a sin-mucky girl and an empty mess on my own.” And I’m so thankful that His specialty is rescuing!
“Sometimes it’s when you’re running on empty that the circumstances are right for God to make His move.” Love this. LOVE it. And love you too. 🙂
Thank you for this. Right now is a very stressful time and I find myself all too often lashing out because I’ve finally had it with all the interruptions. Unfortunately, my fiance is usually on the receiving end of that. Why is that we’re so often the meanest to the ones we love the most? Thanks for the scripture. I needed to see it in that light tonight.
Kara, perhaps it’s because they are safe? Doesn’t make it right, I know. My family should get my best, not my worst! Thankful for new mercies each day…clinging to His grace!
I am here from Ann’s. I know it’s Saturday, but I read the Grateful lists until today – and today and tomorrow are for Walk with Him Wednesday. And so, here I am. And this is really beautiful, {smiling} So letting go is forgiveness after forgiveness – 70 X 7 times. SO much like Our Lord. I really enjoyed reading this!!
God Bless and keep you Kristen
and His face shine upon you…
and all of yours.
Thank you for the blessing, Craig! God bless you and yours, too!
So very nice to meet you, so very lovely here…