When her eyes land on the flowery ocean blue swim cap, she lights up. A friend has offered to buy her first swim cap as a gift, and she emailed two options for Faith to peruse. The first one is solid teal, and she liked it, too. But this colorful, bright-as-a-peacock second choice wins my feisty daughter over.
“How much does each cost?” Faith asks me before taking a bite of breakfast eggs.
I point to the price on the screen.
When she sees her favorite costs more, her lit-up face dims. She sighs and says, “Oh well then, I probably should pick the other
one since it’s less expensive. After all, it’s still very pretty.”
I assure her our friend probably wouldn’t have given her a choice of the two if both weren’t a genuine option.
She pauses, eyebrows furrowed. She takes after her mama who sometimes struggles accepting gifts.
“Well, I do really like this blue flowery one. I’d love to have it, but…only if it’s really okay.”
I lean over her shoulder and look in her gray blue eyes,
“Faith, we need to trust our friend means what she says. Sometimes we just need to accept the gift and let that be the end.”
It can be hard to say ‘yes’ to a gift, especially when we know what it costs the giver. Even if the giver assures us they are thrilled to bless, we hesitate. We feel shy, prideful, and worry this might put them out. Sometimes we’ll even choose the cheaper option, even if it isn’t the one we like best. Or we’ll just say no and wave it away.
Now if the gift is inappropriate or comes with strings attached, by all means say no. But true gifts are given with open hands and open hearts. They bless.
The beauty of this Thanksgiving and Christmas season is God already gave the gift, Jesus born in a humble stable. His presence in our lives is grace, rest, and salvation. He is the hope of glory. We don’t have to do anything for it because it’s already done. We just need to trust the Giver means what He says, which of course He does.
We just have to accept it.
Is it sometimes hard for you to accept gifts, especially more costly gifts?
Compassion International has a team of bloggers in Peru right now. And y’all, the bloggers are doing an incredible job of telling the people’s stories as well as how Compassion brings them hope in the name of Jesus. All the posts can be found nice and neat over here. Give yourself a gift and read one or two?
Now we need a photo of her *wearing* the cap, you know 😛
I hesitate, too…especially with non-material gifts. Even when I’m assured with the most genuine heart that the other is more than happy to give. I recently heard this from two friends who were walking me through a rough patch, for example: “We’re blessed to bless you.” Wise words, friend – let’s just accept the darn gift for what it is!
Oh, I’m with you. Non-material gifts are the hardest. I have a friend here too that says basically the same thing yours does, “We’re blessed to be a blessing.” Something for us all to take to heart ~ for the times we need to accept the gift and as well as remember to give.
Karina Allen says
I struggle very much with accepting gifts whether they are material or not. I am very independent. I rarely ask for help. But I am often on the receiving end of being blessed. I know that my friends enjoy blessing me and I feel blessed when they give me something or do something for me but at the same time, I feel a little bit like a failure. I know God is trying to teach me something. I’m not always quite sure what that is though. I’d much rather be the giver! My prayer is that I will see His purpose in those situations.
I suppose its the prideful part of us that makes us feel a bit like a failure for saying yes? It is humbling. Since all us people fall short on our own, we do need the Giver’s ultimate gift. Perhaps saying ‘yes’ to the everyday gifts from others helps drive this message into the home of our hearts?
Thanks for being here, Karina. I appreciate you!
Just wanted to say I love you and your amazing family!!! You guys are doing an amazing job raising some awesome kiddos! Kinda unrelated to your post, but the truth! 🙂
You’re awesome Jamie, and I’d say that no matter how kind you were to me in the comment. Keep on keepin’ on raisin’ and lovin’ those precious kids of yours. You are doing beautifully. Love you girl!
Amy Tilson says
“Faith, we need to trust our friend means what she says. Sometimes we just need to accept the gift and let that be the end.” – If you can tell me why this brought tears to my eyes I’d be grateful. Gifts can be awkward for me to receive if I’m not giving anything in return, or didn’t even consider giving anything in return. That and the feeling that someone else will go without if I get (not quite as selfless as it sounds – more about feeling guilty). it’s the same with even a small compliment, there is the need to justify it. Thank you! Now I need to go find the kleenex. 🙂
Oh yes, there’s nothing that makes me get all choked up more than a compliment.
You are lovely, Amy. Keep shining, pretty lady! xo
Maura @ My Healthy 'Ohana says
It’s hard for me to let others DO for me sometimes, or see the ways in which I need help or am broken. But it’s when I let people in that I see so much more of God’s grace , learn that leaning on others is not weakness, and develop genuine relationships! I love your posts, Kristen…they are so real and refreshing to read! Hope you are having a great day 🙂
I always appreciate your grace and love hearing your perspective, Maura. Thank you!
This is a great post. I have difficulties with this too! Thank you Kristen!