My boots clip-clop clip-clop on the linoleum floor as I canter into the school auditorium. Today is Faith’s “Student of the Month” luncheon, and I come bearing her requested lunch treat: Subway. When I round the corner and my eyes find her, I’m surprised she looks trembly. As I set her lunch down and swing my legs under the long table, I ask what’s wrong.
Her doe-eyes clouded, she replies,
“Oh, nothing. I just thought you forgot.”
She smiles feebly in her relief.
I look at the cafeteria clock and see it reads five minutes into her lunch. Goodness. I’m five minutes late and she’s worried I forgot completely. Then again, it’s no small wonder she thinks I forgot since I completely and totally forgot both her brothers’ student of the month lunches earlier this year. My saving grace is that both middle school boys assured me that most middle school parents don’t come because mom, it’s really more of a little kid show, anyway.
The next fifteen minutes hold chatting and smiles and hugs. By the end, Faith’s eyes laugh happy. But as I make the short drive home, my mind travels back to this morning when the bickering between two of the three young’uns clawed at my head like fingernails on a chalkboard, resulting in my very unSunday school voice telling both perpetrators exactly what I thought of their behavior.
Losing patience with kids. Late for lunch. I see my parenting grade for the day.
And I remember two nights ago, how the hubs wanted to watch a movie but I shook my no and mentioned working on my ebook with a How ’bout tomorrow night? But then tomorrow night came and I forgot it was the one night of the week where David and I are two ships passing until 10 pm. And sure enough, the next grade shows up bright red.
And so I step over the mess and trudge upstairs to my blue and silver workspace and open the laptop to re-read some of my own blog words. I lean back in the white chair annoyed for choosing such a poor title and ending. That post didn’t get too much traffic, so I assume others agree. And while I’m at it, I’ll just assume my grade in this area, too.
So I slam down the laptop and decide to go make chocolate chip cookies, because if there’s one thing I can ace, it’s cookies. As the cookies swell in the oven, I stare out the window at the whirling snow that is gaining momentum.
Why do I let a mistake or two gain momentum ’til I believe I’ve gone and flunked the entire day?
“If I do not stop and pray immediately – restating His love for me and my righteousness in Him – Satan will take my wave of sorrow as a vulnerability to accusation, and he will proceed with a hurricane of condemnation.” ~Beth Moore, Praying God’s Word.
Sometimes tsunamis come and crush hearts in seconds. But sometimes the enemy gains more ground by grabbing onto a mistake or two and using them to chip away at our hearts a little at a time. If I give him an inch, he’ll take a dozen miles while mowing down my heart like roadkill.
“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because thorough Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.” ~ Romans 8:1
I know there are practical things I can do to show up on time and better manage all 1,982 things I do each week. But the purpose of living a Christ-filled life is to walk in the power of resurrection. I can pray Scripture and let His Word keep Satan’s lies from carving rivers in my heart that turn into canyons of condemnation.
The snow covers everything outside, and I can’t get over how my corner of the earth here gleams white and clean.
I’m thankful He does the same for my heart.
Just a reminder, tomorrow is our next out of the blue link-up! Feel free to stop by and share how God used a surprise adventure to give you joy or grow your faith.