Every whipstitch, the subject of my blog comes up during a conversation with an old friend, a new acquaintance, or a family member. This always surprises me a little–with so many to-do’s on everyone’s list, it’s nice when the one I’m talking with mentions they enjoy reading my blog. But what I find really interesting is how often said person will look at me sheepishly and mention that while she reads the blog, she doesn’t comment.
Or, gasp, she actually apologizes for not commenting. This happens often.
That’s when I do something along the lines of shake my head back and forth vehemently, maybe even grab her hand and say, “Never apologize for that! It isn’t necessary for you to comment! Promise! I still love you and think you’re the bee’s knees just the same!”
A couple weeks ago, y’all graciously affirmed what I feel led to do here. I’m so thankful you said yes! alongside me to fresh air over frantic trends, to cultivating community through commenting over me just standing up and having my say (no thanks). I am so, so grateful. After all, you are smart and insightful, and your words sharpen me. But a handful of you made an interesting statement in your comment to this post, and that comment went something like this, “I don’t usually comment here, but…” While no one directly apologized for not commenting, some of the verbiage came close. This reminded me of something I want to make sure you know. So if you’ll just sit down next to me for a minute, let me look at you and tell you this one thing:
Commenting here is always an option, never a requirement.
The way I see things, this is a place where we meet as friends–good friends who don’t bring expectations to our relationship. Chasing Blue Skies is an open house of sorts, a place you can come and go as you please. If you choose to sit and chat with me, wonderful! I’ll take you up on it every time. But if you’d rather just peruse the rooms and hallways, grab a few bites to eat and be on your merry way, that’s okay too.
I’d rather shut down this blog than create a space that adds one more expectation to your already trailing-to-the-floor list of things to do. We have no demands ’round here. I don’t expect you to bring anything to this blog but simple friendship. For some of you, that friendship shows itself through your comments, and as I said before, I love it when it does. But for many others (for most others, according to my stats), your friendship shows itself through heartfelt prayers or simply through your presence. This makes me smile with contentment just the same.
You darlin’ people have lives to lead. You have groceries to buy, chicken to bake, families to love. Some days your only time to read is while waiting in line at Target. Whatever the circumstance that brings you under these blue skies, may you find a good word and an encouraging breath of fresh air. May you find others who, like you, are on a quest to live true to the unique way God fashioned them and true to the way Jesus sees them. But under no circumstances may you ever find pressure to leave a comment.
So if commenting on blogs–especially this blog– isn’t your thing?
No worries. Promise.
Now onward with your day, friends. xo
Thanks, Sister! I’ve been judged by my lack of comments, or emails by others before! Our self worth should never be tied up in validation from others. While it is nice to be validated….we will only be truly happy when we relize WE are enough. We are, after all, made in HIS image!!
Smooooch sister! xoxoxoxo
You. Are. Beautiful. And I LOVE the sentiment you shared here! Blogging life in the fast lane is all about the numbers, and the shares, and the comments. But the reality is, those blogs are like fast food – nice quick hot now and can be really good once in a while… but they don’t know the first thing about crock pot writing that is so SAVORY and SCRUMPTIOUS that you find yourself going back to find more ways to savor again and again! XOXO
So well said, Ann Marie. Love you! xo
You’re the best. Really. Reading here is a deep breath of fresh air. xoxo
Will you come be my neighbor already? Really. So thankful for you Kristin.
Yes. I will be there soon if Colorado really looks like those pictures you post! 🙂 Seriously, though, how sweet it would be to live near you!
I truly adore you, Kristen. Coming here is a breath of fresh air! xoxo
Beth, that’s high praise coming from you. Thank you for loving me so well. xoxo
I’m a commenter. I love comments, I can’t help it. It’s where friendships are built. I just posted this week on my blog on the disappearance of comments. It makes me sad the way the blogging world is changing. Everything anymore seems to be about how much we can pimp our post via pinterest, facebook and instagram. I just miss the good old days of commenting and friendships. But, no pressure, just a wistful missing of sorts.
*Totally* understand, Lisa.
It’s all rather exhausting, isn’t it? Here’s to shared friendship and love notes via the comment box. Much love to you!
I have been reading your blog for a couple years, and it was only when I got my own blog {recently} that I began to comment, because I realized how much I enjoy perusing what my readers have to say. 🙂 Thank you for always providing a small space on the internet that helps me to breathe easier. Love reading your posts!
And thank you for being such a gracious friend here, Bethany.
This is part of what makes you so gracious and precious. It’s also what makes me want to tell you that, right here , or anywhere really. You are a rare bird that makes everyone feel so welcome and loved and I just wish you were around the corner from me (especially since you are apparently having weather near the 70s today)! xoxo!!
Amy, there are not one but two houses for sale near me. Let’s be neighbors!
Don’t tempt me! One of my best friends lives in Castle Rock. But, there is also a house behind ours on the farm in VA for sale! 🙂
Kristen,
Thank you! A lot of times I read blogs and nothing comes to mind to comment about. It so wonderful to have great Christian women who write such insightful information and encourage us out there!
Keep up the good work! 🙂
You are refreshing! What a sweet place to rest – and just be!
That is so sweet and such a relief that it made this bashful commentor feel like commenting 🙂
You’re such a blessing. I was having such a bummer of a day, especially regarding a misunderstanding from an overwrought and overworked ministry friend who mistook a lengthy email sent to encourage (and with no expectation of a reply) as one more pressure or thing on an already over-burdened to do list.
In my tears I poured out my heart to the Lord Jesus and he reminded me of an email I’d received from (in)courage about the courage it takes to be an encourager. I just found and re-read that email.
And through it, I found your blog and read this timely post.
Thank you
I’m thankful for you and other bloggers who encourage me and keep me focused on Jesus and be real moms, wifes, sisters, friends. Thanks for the cozy place to rest for a few minutes.
Just had to say that that photo is really nice. 🙂 It made me smile. I love casual shots from the other side of the screen.
Thank you for this lovely reminder to me as a blogger. Comments are not why I’m writing.
Appreciate this like crazy. I heart your blog! Prayers and hugs, sister. I love perusing around here and will continue to do so with my very-rarely-commenting self. 😉
Dear Kristen,
I get a lot of devotions in the mail. I like to read through a lot of them and write down what just meets my need at that time. I then write down on paper. Sometimes I have a devotion just full of comments. Other times God has done His wonders and all of the bits and pieces seem to fit together and made a puzzle. I have read your devotion many times. I know you are married to someone in the Air Force, well my youngest son is in the Air Force. I belong to a group of women who call themselves Moms of the Military (MOMS) We have a great director in California and a woman who has taken it upon herself and written a devotion for us moms, girlfriends, granmas and you name any one else who likes to have devotions about military life. I send copies of my devotion to many of the MOMS and some don’t want them and some do. I don’t have the know how to put them in one big group and just push a button and suddenly they all appear. I have to individually add their names every day that I send a devotion. My son is starting his 5th year in the Air Force but he has been deployed and that is very scary. God brought him home safely and I have an older son who is working on finishing his Bachelor’s Degree at a college in Nacogdoches, Texas. I don’t comment because I am not goot with words and just don’t want to show my ignorance. I have felt so good about some of the things you and other ladies have said but I don’t want to go show you how dumb I am. I had my children late in life so I am just now an empty nester and I think most of the women writing seem to be so young, but I love it when you all are so transparent. It makes me wish you lived right next door. My best friend is 93 years old and she is a winner. I wish I had a friend near my age but I don’t. I get musch fellowship through the devotions that you write and I am drawn to them because I am a little like Mary Southerland and being plum happy is sometimes very hard for me. It is all my fault I know that but it is nice to know there is someone out there who isn’t Mary Sunshine all the time and feels like a real person. I also enjoy Holley Gerth. There are many who I love to read but I have commented before and thought I just was a little too much as far as sharing like we don’t want to hear the grit and the grim and I have not responded since. But many of you have made it into my daily devotions to these women and you all have blessed my socks off and theirs too. I get very little feedback from these women and sometimes it hurts but I just have to believe that it matters to some and I shouldn’t be looking at ego strokes. But I love to read your devotions and you say something about chasing blue skies. Well I’m 58 and I have shared more than a few Blue Skies and sometimes I am so blessed by what I read in your devotion, but feel like honey I could probably be your mother and a grandmother to your children. Try not to take it personally when you don’t hear comments. I know it is hard. You want to know if you are doing something for the Lord for it to seem like it matters to others and sometimes they refuse to talk, I mean you might as well be pulling their teeth. I don’t know how to change it but I felt like I had to respond to this because I know I have written things and given you credit for them from your devotions. I like it and I’m just a hick from Texas. You are loved. I wish you could come to my house and give me a wardrobe make-over and teach me how to put make-up on. Lord know where we could go from there, you are loved and appreciated.
Love,
Nelda Sparkman