A Surprising Picture of Friendship

I know it’s what the best parents believe, but honestly it’s never sat well with me.

The kind of friend I used to be doesn’t sit well either, the one who’d rather die than talk honestly about difficult things because you might {!!!} get mad at me. I’ve shaken my head up and down for the sake of agreement when I wanted to shake it back and forth. I’ve learned choosing this easy road really is selfish, especially when it’s at the expense of a friend’s best interest. I’ve come to know that’s not a true friend.

Thankfully and gracefully, God saw fit to introduce me to a gloriously good posse of friends, and I’ve formed friendships strong enough to weather all the honest talk in the world. These friends {and maturity} show me true-blue friends put others’ interests ahead of their own. So, when it’s necessary to share hard things, I do because I care about what’s best instead of easy or comfortable. At least, usually.

A true-blue friend has your best interest at heart.

She covers offenses with love. She speaks with grace. She encourages more and cheers louder than any varsity cheerleader. Oh, she won’t do these things perfectly. I might roll my eyes at her, get annoyed with her, or just plain get mad. She’ll do the same at me. But after the dust settles, we give grace and cut each other some slack because pure intensions flow from a pure heart. 

When I paint these facts of authentic friendship down on canvas, I discover a picture of how I pray my children see me, too: as a true-blue friend.

I am the only woman in the world James, Ethan and Faith call Mama. What a singularly special, awesome honor this is! Still, the heavy responsibility of that sometimes makes me sink down in my chair. There are so many ways to mess up, and mess up I do. I scribble on the canvas of their hearts time and again. But God reminds me I was never asked or expected to mother alone. I lean on Him and He fills the gaps while lifting me up.

He tells me a true-blue mama has her kids’ best interests at heart. Of course, they roll their eyes at me, get annoyed with me, and just plain get mad. But I do what I must because I care about what’s best instead of easy or comfortable.

So while I’m first and foremost their mama, I don’t mind being their true friend. I know that’s not a popular parenting statement. I know you may think I’m chock-full of the cuh-razy. That’s okay. I don’t mind disagreeing with you. Usually.

Dear Lord, help me to drown my children’s offenses in love. Help me to live and speak grace to them, to cheer and encourage infinitely more than I criticize or complain. Help me look at their faces and see Jesus, and help me teach them He is the only friend who never fails.In the mighty name of Jesus,

{and all the mamas said}

Amen

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