Alternate title for this post? When What You’re Supposed to Do Makes You Feel Like a Scaredy Cat Who Wants to Please Everybody.
I’ve been writing more regularly for a couple years now. And often while writing, I still see a room full of imaginary people rolling their eyes at me. I see that facebook friend I haven’t spoke with since high school whispering. I see the distant family member laughing over all the awkward things younger me did. I see the close by friend shaking her head with a who-does-she-think-she-is look. They all tell me I’m empty of talent and full of hot air.
Now, the truth is, people are not analyzing me nearly as much as my prideful self thinks they are. It’s all pretty much in my head, but the enemy uses it to steal my confidence in my callings and convince me my gifts are useless. It’s a trick I fall for not only with writing, but with other jobs of mine including wifing and parenting.
Do you ever feel this way? Like you know what you need to do but feel more afraid than brave? Will you sit with me at (in)courage and tell me about it?
oh boy do I! I feel this way – more afraid than brave – so much. Too much. Headed over to (in)courage right now 🙂
I read this this am when the in courage round up of posts came through and it helped me today to do the work I needed to do and not think about how it would be received. I love what you said here too. So so true of me the cringeing about how certain people may be reacting! X